Hot Springs, AR - On Monday the Mountain Pine School Board voted unanimously to allocate funds for the purchase of 10 high-powered water guns for the Mountain Pine Police. “Due to rising crime statistics in the area, we’ve decided to better arm our law enforcement officers.”
The leftover funds will be used for 100 training hours on the new weapons. “What we are looking at is having the first water gun-certified department in the state. It will go a long way in promoting professionalism within the MPPD.” The school board is using water guns as a pilot program that they are hoping will lead to the allocation of stun guns. “We have to take baby steps and see what our boys in blue are capable of. We don’t want to have another incident where someone loses a testicle because of a taser misfire.”
When reached for comment, the chief of police said, “We appreciate the hard work they are putting into making this a great department. Maybe one day we won’t even have to pay for our gas in our 20-year-old police cruisers.”